Understanding The Relationship Chinese Girls Share With Their Mother-In-Law

Since the ancient times, China has been a family oriented society with the elders controlling the family in a hierarchical order. As such when it comes to marriages, most Chinese girls are placed lowest in family hierarchy at least until the time another daughter-in-law arrives in the family to take their place. Unlike most western societies where the concept of a vicious, aggressive and controlling mother-in-law is considered long outdated, most Chinese mothers-in-law are still stereotypically tough and not easy to satisfy which often makes their relationship with their daughter-in-laws quite rocky.

It is quite common for the Chinese mothers-in-law to move in with her newlywed son, even if only for a short duration. Since she is at the top of the hierarchy amongst the females of the family, she has natural authority over the household as well as her new daughter-in-law. Chinese girls are taught to expect and even bear the temperament of their mothers-in-law, which can easily be anything between bossy to downright cruel. It is believed that older women after marrying off their sons tend to feel insecure about losing them to their daughters-in-law and hence rage a sort of battle against these other females on an emotional and mental level. The roots for such behavior lie in the ancient traditions and beliefs of Chinese society, according to which, children, especially boys are treated more like an asset by the parents rather than individuals, even after they grow up.

It is believed that one reason behind the increasing divorce rates between couples in modern China is the everyday household tussle between Chinese girls and their mothers-in-law. With a majority of young Chinese females today following independent lifestyles and pursuing successful careers, adjusting to the traditional outlook and thinking of their mothers-in-law becomes extremely difficult for them. At the same time, a number of older women fail to place the happiness of their children before their personal ego and insecurities which prevents them from developing a cordial relationship with their daughter-in law.

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